Back by popular demand! This one is the best!
(In reality a response to Dustin’s request)
But nevertheless, here’s another law school feature!
Sigalle Barness’ poem on civil procedure!
The hardship of deciding where to sue is no fiction,
Damn the things needed to ascertain jurisdiction!
Subject, Personal, Venue, and the Pleadings!
Whatever happened to December’s seasons greetings?
Ok, focus, Sigalle, you need to study your shit!
Ok so what if A lived in State B for a bit?
You must understand where it is safe to file!
Think residence, think citizenship, think domicile!
So let me get this hypothetical straight, My brain is not working this late,
A left State B for State U in his VW,
Stopped for a whopper in State C for a few,
Where D, from State Z, was also passing through.
When both cars collided on the highway that night,
D swore to A that he would put up a fight.
So D went to you, yes YOU (the brand new lawyer),
And asked to you to judge what happened under Pennoyer.
“But wait… that’s obsolete! Its minimum contacts,” you say,
Fair and substantial justice is what is used today!”
One point for you here and another point taken away,
The test is almost here! Only 40 hours away!!
I must calm down and stop my head from spinning,
its not about losing or about winning,
It’s understanding your “nada” without being over seventy-five thousand,
And that Rule 11 will sanction you for not knowing beforehand.
Remember that being diverse is what also makes you actionable,
And that knowing about “the shoe” is not about being fashionable.
At least this knowledge allows me to avoid the jurisdiction of school,
Say and act how you want! I know I’m safe! I’m not the fool!
But just then it hits me.
I feel my mind at the point of derailment.
Oh No. That’s right.
I forgot about purposeful availment.